A lot of it is all psychological and having studied psychology as a module when studying towards my Sociology degree, I know how certain experiences can taint somebody, leaving mental scars in the process. Kim use to be an attractive rapper when she first burst onto the music scene with debut album "Hardcore" over a decade ago. Her features were ethnic yet gratifying. But when I look at her surgically-ravished face I don't see ethnic or European features. I have yet to see a black person with that type of nose. Hell, I have yet to see a white person with that type of nose. 3 times bad luck huh? It's kind of like looking at someone suffocating all because they have an invisible peg on their nose.
But anyway, let me delve deeper. Many black men (especially the ugly ones) are attracted to white women and light-skinned women. Kim unfortunately, fell in love with a man who had no regard for brown sista's and he certainly wasn't going to put himself with a sista of his own complexion. The man in question was the late rapper Christopher "Biggie" Wallace. Biggie did not respect Kim and only saw her as a piece of ass to satisfy his pleasures. It pains my heart to see this black woman talk so highly and lovingly of a man who felt nothing for her because if he did, he would not have married R&B singer Faith Evans, whilst he was still messing around with her. But you know, he never wanted to marry a brown sista, period.
It was very clear the type of women Biggie had eyes for - light skinned women who were half white (Faith Evans, Charli Baltimore, etc). So yes, of course this was going to affect Kim in some way. It is clear Kim felt inferior to these women all because she didn’t have what they had to win over Biggie's affections but more importantly, she didn’t look like them. Maybe she felt more propelled to alter herself to look more like the type of woman Biggie was attracted to. Over the years this woman's skin complexion has become lighter, she wears white people's make-up, use to wear bleach blonde weaves and blue eye contacts and bleaches her skin, need I say more?
It becomes really sad when you cosmetically change yourself just for the sake of a black man. If he doesn't accept you for you then you should think of yourself highly and forget about him. You'd find a man who will appreciate you and your true beauty. At the end of the day, those black men simply aren't worth it. Moulding yourself into somebody else's image all because that look is more embraced is a sign of vulnerability but also conveys a lack of self-appreciation and if you can't appreciate yourself, how do you expect anybody else to?
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